Part I of the Idiot 'ilogies.
Assorted Idiots...
Such a variety -- where do I begin?
How's about here...
Imagine yourself taking a lovely roadtrip with a travel buddy... Somewhat spur of the moment -- a decision made one day in advance -- but why not?! There's something about spontaneity that is invigorating, daring and downright exciting....
Your anaphylactic nemesis is of the food variety, so you pack a few things that you know you can eat safely... A couple of oranges, peanut butter, honey, a loaf of whole wheat bread, a can of salted peanuts, unsalted pistachios, a couple of apples, and bottled water. You are hoping to find a few lovely restaurants that can accommodate you, but are carrying these things as snack food, as well as possible short term meal alternatives in the event that the local establishments are unfit.
You're going to a wonderfully scenic destination, but the drive is long. Along the way, the two of you decide to stop to stretch your legs, use the restrooms, and possibly grab some lunch. The first three are working beautifully... However, when it comes to the meal, you realize that the rest stop only has fast food of the "it's gonna give you Delhi Belly" variety... Which sets off alarms for you -- places like this are never able to accommodate you, even on Opening Day.
You subtlely vocalize your concerns to your friend... Expressing your hesitation and discomfort should be enough... However, your friend, usually the first to get subtlety, subtlely ignores your concern. You study the situation to determine your probability... You survey the ingredients in the dishes... The garnishes used and how it is laid out in the display... The way the food is being prepared and cooked... How the servers handle the food...
Your friend delightedly states that she can't tell whether to get #3 or #7, as you stare down a particularly menacing-looking croissant sandwich. You express your concern in less ambiguous terms -- "I don't feel comfortable eating here -- I don't think they can prepare something for me without contamination...". Your friend gleefully places an order for a #7... At which point, you realize your friend is truly a #2....
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